An ode to moi.

I'm sensitive.

I'm needy.

I require a lot of attention.

I ask a lot of questions.

I'm shy.

I don't know what to do if someone doesn't like me.

I'm working on becoming more independent/self-sufficient.

I'm the sweetest person you'll ever know.

I hold a grudge like no other.

I completely agree that the first 10 pounds to lose are the easiest.

I'm a crier.

I don't take criticism well.

I feel like I sometimes am completely alone.

I'm happier now than I've ever been.

I put myself last, always.

And now you know.

My conclusions of the day. Oh, and TMI.

Sometimes I hate how much constant access I have to an infinite amount of information, right at my finger tips. And of course I always read worst case scenarios. Survival rates of worst case scenarios can really put a damper on an evening. Positive thinking!

Medical bills are expensive. I would like to request a detailed break down of every last dollar, please.

CANCER. That's a scary word. But Stage 0 isn't as scary.

I feel like my life in the last year has revolved around nervously waiting for updated information from one doctor's appointment to the next.

It's helpful to have a Sarah around for my appointments. More than a Sarah knows.

My furry babies make almost everything better.

Pads suck. I already miss tampons and I'm not even bleeding.

I can't wait for my next doctor's bill :-/

my hair is never short enough these days

So dieting isn't as bad as I thought it would be. My stomach isn't starting to eat itself, I'm not anymore cranky than I normally am, I don't plan my week, waiting for a night when I can blow everything on a giant-sized Big Mac combo at McDonalds. I want THIS to be my bikini summer! Even if it involves just wearing a bikini underneath cute little water shorts and a tank top. I'm not THAT kind of girl, sheesh. My online diet program congratulated me yesterday after my first week on the plan. I had gone down about 3.5 pounds since the previous Monday. Woot! Initially I had gone down 5, but Qdoba always calls to me on the weekends. And so does Pie Hole at 2 in the morning after a show. I can't help these attractions that I have, so I don't ignore them, and I act on them...passionately. So I'm slowly reaching my short term weight loss goal of 10% of my starting weight. And on from there!

Work is almost over. I can think of an infinite number of places I would rather be right now, than here. When will my bakery/tea business start off? When will I no longer work for the man? When will I be appreciated? I always let my work life affect my personal life, and I hate that. *sigh* My last few precious moments of the work day are being spent snooping into people's court history, finding out if they've been arrested, how many speeding tickets they have, if they are a chomo, things like that.

Blah, dentist appointment the day after tomorrow, and lady procedure the day after that.

Fun times.

My current value: 29 points of gibberish

Weight Watchers. Doesn't the name make you cringe? Yes, I'm a card-carrying member. Well, a virtual card.

Dieting has never gotten along well with me, obviously. But with the onset of June, I have entered a new frame of mind. Should climbing a flight of stairs really make me feel THAT old? One of these days at the gym, I'm going to actually crank up the speed on the treadmill, and face my fear of people seeing me jog. Portion control is my new best friend.

I keep cutting my hair shorter and shorter. Long hair is such a drag. A real downer. Especially when it always looks like a rat's nest. Short hair makes me feel sassy and rejuvenated.

Sarah won't get up. She's cranky in the mornings. But I think if I act like a tiny kitten or duckling, she'll be really happy.

Mew, mew, quack, quack.

I'm really digging on local acoustic female singers (shut up you-know-who). I'm going to convince Sarah (aka you-know-who) to go with me to a 3-lady show at the VAC in a couple Thursdays. She basically HAS to go with me, because I have a painful-sounding lady procedure the next day. Painful-sounding lady procedure trumps all!! Poor little lady flower :-( Ughhh.

I can't wait until the Brandi Carlile concert.

I especially can't wait to start couponing.

baby's got back....and some hips too

So, at some point, warmer weather will be upon us. I'm nowhere near the market of wearing any kind of pants shorter than capri length. Bermuda shorts just don't flatter me at this point in my dieting stage. I'm in the market for a closet of fun shirts, dresses, shirt-dresses to go over leggings, basically ANYTHING that will prevent me from having to go on a dreaded PANTS shopping excursion (and anything that will cover my legs from the knees up...yes, I have THAT kind of body image).

Like before, I'm first calling on Anthropologie to find the cutest of the cute options. Obviously, full price clothing items at this store are not anywhere near my price range. Especially since I live in a house where cats like to lose control of their bladders on some of my favorite shirts, and dog drool is aplenty. But a girl can dream.

I love this color. What would you call it? Turquise? It's definitely not just "blue" as the website calls it. I could definitely see myself with a plain colored tank top/camisole, and a light cardigan/shrug over the top. Love it!



Now, I know, this looks a little stuffy....but for the days where I feel a little schoolmarmish, (and those days occur more than you'd think) this is the perfect gem! But don't you ever have days where you just can't handle exciting colors/patterns, and want to detract attention? A little bit of leg, vertical pleats/buttons, basic colors... Maybe it adds a few years on, but I can see it being super cute with some Mary Jane flats, or even go all out with a splash of red somewhere in the rest of the outfit just in case anyone wonders if I'm actually a 65 year old cat lady. Nope, just a 25 year old geek.



And now on to the dresses...oh MAN, do I love dresses.

To be honest, I have mixed feelings about this one. Love the twists on the shoulder and the front (tum-tum camouflage!) but I'm just not feeling the gradation of color/layers at the bottom. It reminds me of the trio of colors shown on a lot of paint samples at Lowes. But even so, it looks super soft and comfy!



Most of all, I love that the color of this dress is "paprika". Can I please have this dress and wear it to work, dinner, downtown, AND to bed? The only downfall would be the instructions to hand-wash. But laundry is more Sarah's department, and boy does she do it well!



Not for everyone, but having a little black dress is a requirement for some. I won't deny that I have one hanging in the back of my closet. Go to anthropologie.com and find this dress, and zoom in on the gathering on it. Love it. Need it!



I might be on a bit of a gathered fabric kick for my favorite Anthropologie looks, but once you get past the possibly nauseating green, you'll have to have this shirt. Perfect with a little black cardigan!



I'll try to stop having clothing/fashion-themed blogs. But I just can't help hearting the heck out of this store. Now I just need to figure out how I have not won the lottery yet, so that I can actually afford ONE of these items. Oy vey.

Why yes, I do still exist

Something you should know about me -- I like to refer to female genetalia as a lady flower. I also like to refer to the back door as the "OTHER lady flower". Don't get them confused, please. But now I pose a question to myself...if my lady flower really was a flower, what kind would it be?

The obvious answer, thanks to Georgia O'Keefe, would be an iris.



Yes, a black and grey iris. Perhaps the dreary colors represent the hardships that women have endured throughout time. The glass ceilings, the sexism, the domestic violence, the limited rights. But then looking through the outer petals, there's a small burst of color. Oh wait, that's just my cut-up cervix. Never mind!

Sunflowers. Bright, colorful, cheery. Maybe a little too cheery?



A love lilies. A tiger lily has a nice ring to it. Meow!



But for now, I've decided on the common daisy. A lawn weed that moonlights as a cute little flower. Neither loud and brash, nor overbearing, adapts easily to complete any hanging basket, flower pot or garden. Easily blends into the background of a crowd of colorful, more vibrant blooms. Revives quickly from being mowed over. Even sticks and stones can't hurt THIS (lady) flower. But words might make it wilt. Okay, maybe not.



But nonetheless, don't be a jerk. She's sensitive.

tiny kitten gets her revenge

there goes my heart

Just one thing.....
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http://www.babieswithglasses.com

(go to the gallery link)

That is all.

my favorite store of 2010...thus far

I've only recently discovered the glory known as Anthropologie.....but I'm already in love, and I'm don't care who knows it. If my yearly income had a couple more zeroes before the decimal point, I might have more items to show for my newfound love. But, nonetheless, I don't know how I ever lived without their housewares section.

After my visit today, I have realized how plain and boring all of my drawer handles and door knobs are.







Oh man...

I want my house to look less cookie cutter, and more eccentric, and eclectic, and full of all the best items I can find at flea markets and second hand stores.

I want to live in a house that WASN'T built in the 21st century. All the good houses were built circa 1970 and earlier. Granted, I love my air conditioning, and my three-pronged electrical outlets, and the fact that my foundation isn't sliding in two directions, and how wonderfully low I can keep my heating bill in the winter due to insulation. But STILL!

Moving on...



I think my cooking would taste that much better if I did it in this little number.







I've decided that instead of collecting shot glasses, or glass figurines, or snowmen, or husbands, finding the most interesting and cute measuring cups and spoons will be my new hobby.

But for today, my only purchase was this:



At first glance, it looks like a lovely glass vase (which I do need more of around the house). But looking again, it is a multifaceted glass measuring container. Each side is responsible for a different kind of measurement, i.e. cups, milliliters, fluid ounces. It even has different measurement sides for sifted flour and then sugar, or rice. Cooking hasn't become this simple since my Kitchen-Aid mixer.

Now, get thee to Anthropologie, and have the time of your life.

fondue à deux

How delicious can the end of a decade be? Oh yes....THAT delicious. As much as I love supporting the economy, I just can't justify paying nearly triple digits for a meal. Especially when the patrons are basically cooking the meal themselves. It's just not right. So I decided to bring the flavor of The Melting Pot to my living room for a little New Year's Eve dinner. Started with a basic fondue of Swiss, Gruyere, and white wine. Added a couple of my personal favorite prime time players: artichoke hearts and spinach. And I could have died right there a happy girl. But Sarah didn't want me to die, so on we ate...




There's the initial image of the meal layout.....the one that WON'T be shown to the health inspectors when I eventually try to open my tea lounge in Boise.



And the one sans cat hair.



Fondue is really funny....



Even Sarah could hardly contain her excitement and laughter...and she's a robot.

Oh, and that picture might be forcibly removed by no choice of mine in the near future...get a good look now.

So all in all, New Years Eve turned out to be better spent at home in the comfort of my house, with my favorite girl and my favorite animals, than at any loud bar or club. I've made my resolutions and intend to start on them immediately, and then slowly end them around March. It's just what I do. 2009 treated me very nicely, and I hope that 2010 is even better.

Oh, and just for kicks...



Sarah, do you have no manners?